Raging Raven previews Ulster’s Heineken Cup chances in his own inimitable fashion!
“So it begins.” This is my favourite quote from the Lord of the Rings trilogy, said before the battle at Helm’s Deep between the men of Rohan and the oruk-hal of Isengard.
And no, I am not referring to the Heineken Cup, but the dribble written by the rest of Ireland regarding Ulster’s chances in the Heineken Cup. Conspiracy theories abound. It would appear that the ERC, in conjunction with the IRFU, have hatched a plan to promote the cause of Ulster.
The plan as Peter O’Reilly tells us in the Sunday Times is called Operation Ulster. The IRFU began the process by bankrolling the three most significant southern hemisphere signings to Ulster when poor old Munster and Leinster are hiring B-listers. Questioning how can Ulster possibly afford it when less than 12 months ago we were all reading about Ulster’s financial travails.
What they fail to mention is the fact that Leinster and Munster have been signing A-listers for years. Who were Ulster signing when Leinster were signing the likes of Felipe Contiponi and Rocky Elson and Munster Doug Howlett and Jean de Villiers?
The ERC have also played their part by rigging the Cup Draw! Even though it is a merit based ranking system the ERC contrived to give Ulster an easy group. Sorry I can’t see it. Three former Champions and what is now effectively half of Italy in the same group, easy? Give us a break, Biarritz only lost the last Heineken Cup final by 2 points .
Who in Leinster’s or Munster’s group bar themselves have won in Europe? None bar Clermont. The fact that the Sunday Times would print such garbage just shows how one eyed the southern hacks are, getting their retaliation in early just incase Ulster actually do progress out of their group for the first time 12 years. Green cheese comes to mind.
So there you go its all a fix and Ulster are assured of a record group win and a winning day out on 21 May 2011. Laugh, I nearly cried!
If I could quote another passage from the Lord of the Rings:
Pippin: Look, there’s smoke to the south!
Treebeard: There’s always smoke rising from Isengard these days.
Pippin: What is it?
Merry: It’s Saruman’s army. The war has started.
I for one can’t wait. 
ULSTER HEINEKEN CUP 2010/11 FIXTURES
ROUND 1 – 8 October, 2010 V Aironi Ravenhill
ROUND 2 – 17 October, 2010 V Biarritz Parc des Sports Aguilera
ROUND 3 – 11 December, 2010 V Bath Ravenhill
ROUND 4 – 18 December, 2010 V Bath The Recreation Ground
ROUND 5 – 14/15/16 January, 2011 V Biarritz Ravenhill
ROUND 6 – 21/22/23 January, 2011 V Aironi Stadio Luigi Zaffanella
QUARTER-FINALS – 8/9/10 April, 2011
SEMI-FINALS – 30 April/1 May, 2011
16th HEINEKEN CUP FINAL – Millennium Stadium, Cardiff – 21 May 2011
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So there you go its all a fix and Ulster are assured of a record group win and a winning day out on 21 May 2011. Laugh, I nearly cried!
You may laugh Mr. Raven, but Johann Muller is deadly serious about being there on 21 May 2011. Just read the FRU transcript of the Meet the Nearly Bonkers evening and you’ll see what I mean….
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Ballpark you have misunderstood the post. I was laughing at the conspiracy theory promoted by the southern press who obviously see Ulster’s chances of progressing in the Heineken Cup much better than that of their own Provinces and are getting their excuses in early by saying the competition has been fixed in Ulsters favour.
It is no laughing matter.
Hope this clarifies things.
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