At long last someone in the scientific world has come out and said something that we have all known for many, many years, namely that the “ugly” members of the Front Row are better lovers.
Researchers modelled the concept of “spreading sperm” mathematically in a paper to be published in the journal American Naturalist.
One member of the team, PhD student Sam Tazzyman (yep his real name), from the Centre of Mathematics and Physics in the Life Sciences and Experimental Biology (CoMPLEX) at University College London, said (in so many words):
It’s pretty much like rugby really! You have the pretty boy backs running around making passes all over the place whereas the slow and steady Front Row tend to go for fewer but much more sustained and intense periods of contact and generally they leave a bit more of themselves behind on and off the pitch!
This leading edge research may go some way to explaining how certain members of The FRU always manage to end up in photo’s with rather good looking girls! It’s all down to some deep-seated genetic need on behalf of the girls – they just can’t help it!
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3 Responses to “The Front Row are “Better Lovers”!”
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The front row should be. Quite a few of them are hookers!
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Recent research published shows that men suffer an immediate decline in IQ when speaking to an attractive woman. The more attractive the woman, the more the decline in IQ. Perhaps this explains this particular piece!
By the way, the woman’s IQ stays the same.
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Just reporting the facts boys, like any good journalist! No phone tapping at the FRU – we just steal our stories from the papers.
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